My daughter Anjolie shaved off half her eyebrows last night. The FRONT half. She hid this from me until this morning as I was leaving for work this morning.
She said she was shaving her legs (why? Not even going to touch on that right now) and got startled, which somehow magically made her arm jerk up in such a way that it equally shaved off half of each one of her eyebrows.
Now while this story just REEKS of bullsh*t….I'm certain that the embarrassment at school will be ample punishment. Now…WHY did she do it? I have no freaking idea. A botched amateur makeover I think? I can only imagine the many hours she laid awake last night mentally beating herself up for getting rid of HALF her eyebrows, and then frantically trying to come up with a "plausible" explanation.
Now what could be worse than going to school with only half of each eyebrow? Answer: Her big sister Kaia decided to be "helpful" this morning after I left for work and tried to color them in. So apparently Anjolie went on her way to 4th grade with GIGANTIC, thick, dark groucho marx style drawn-in eyebrows. Good Lord. I think she just got punked by her big sister. BAD.
I feel for her – elementary school is a cruel cruel world. Especially for a girl with big fake black eyebrows. I think she's going to need a hug when I get home, along with some tips on proper plucking. But then again, she's a brave girl, sure of herself, and pretty damn fabulous. Who knows? Maybe she'll start a new trend. Or something.